super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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