okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
