I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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