Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
