He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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