yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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