bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
