You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Of course I have a pirate flag
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
