im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
