that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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