You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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