you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
