he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
