Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
