I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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