i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
