Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
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