Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
