just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize