im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize
