Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
