Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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