ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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