who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I wanna passion pit in your ass
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
