Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Randomize
