At least make sure they are 18
Why
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
