My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
