I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
