Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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