Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
