i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize
