i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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