Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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