I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
