Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
is wine microwaveable?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
There's always time for handjobs
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Randomize