my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
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