We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
