i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
