we have officially lost it.
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
