I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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