Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
