I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Randomize
