Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
