I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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