there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
