Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize
