He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
