Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Randomize
