I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
She bit a glass in half.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
