Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
